To the One Who Has No Father.

Today sucks! Can I say that on my Christian blog? I speak honestly, so yes, I’ll say it for you.  Today sucks! I understand because Mother’s Day always did for me.

So many beautiful souls have grown up without a father figure at all and it has caused a severe void.  Maybe that’s you.  Maybe you were able to figure out a way to move forward anyway.  Maybe this fact has held you back.  Maybe it’s caused you not to know how to be a great spouse or parent.  Maybe it has left you longing for effection in more broken relationships.

Others of you have lost your Father to things like, death, natural or otherwise.  Maybe you’ve lost yours to drugs & alcohol, to sexual addiction, or jail.  Maybe you’ve lost yours simply due to divorce.

It hurts.

It’s hard.

He’s gone.

Deuteronomy 31:8

The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. 

I have four (4) things I need you to do for your own peace.  This is for you.

1. Spiritually: I want you to call on the name of the Lord, Jesus.  I know it’s hard when you’re hurting.  You want to be angry. You want to see your past and feel you pain… Or so you think you do.  You feel unloved and undeserving.  You think “why would God not give me a dad, or why did he give me the one he did?” Maybe you live in embarrasment because of his mistakes or shame believing you are a mistake. 

Psalm 89:26

 And he (she) will call out to me, ‘You are my Father, my God, and the Rock of my salvation.

Let Him be your father. Let the God of our salvation become yours.  Allow Him to lead you and guide you where you should go.  Take His advice, learn from Him, become the man/woman HE desires you to be. Pray and ask Him for His peace, His joy, and His blessings.  They far outweigh anything a human being can give to you.

2. Physically: I know.  I get it.  God himself can not be here to ride bikes with you, be at your graduation, walk you down the isle or give advice on how to be a great husband or father (verbally).  He can’t physically be here to wrap is big daddy arms around you or to BBQ with you.  He can’t be here to do the simple things in life physically with you.

Find someone who can be that man in your life.  Be honest. Be open. Be welcoming.  Be trusting.

Be that parent. Find someone you can mentor.  Volunteer at places like the Boys & Girls Club or the YMCA.  Give of yourself.  Give someone else the love and companionship you’re missing.

3. Don’t Miss Your Mark: Don’t miss your opportunity to change someone’s life.  

– To your own children, be the father you always needed to have.  Be that man for your own children.  Don’t let them feel your pain.  Don’t allow them to know the life you have known.  Give them your time and your whole heart.  Pour into them what you have needed yourself.

Share your story. Many people have walked your path in one way or another.  Many more are walking it now.  Sharing your story will change your life and it will also show these beautiful people that they are not alone. Your story can bring healing and restoration to others.  Yes! You ARE good enough! Yes! YOUR story matters! So do you!

4. Make Today YOURS: For years and years Mother’s Day was a completely hated day for me.  I would be hateful and emotional several days leading up to it, then on that Sunday I would be miserable! Nothing could make me happy.  It was hard. 

Two (2) years ago I decided to make Mother’s Day about me. I decided it was my day for me to celebrate me.  I decided I would be happy with my husband and our children and I would push through any negativity I felt and I would make it about me. I decided that any time I started to feel depressed or emotional I would say to myself “I love my mom still, but today is my day.  She had hers.  It’s my turn to be blessed, it’s my day.”

I had to shift my focus and take ownership of my rightly entitlement.  I am entitled to own this day.  I don’t need expensive gifts or anything “special” to make this day mine, I just need to own it! 

This has helped me tramendously!! Take ownership of TODAY! It’s YOUR day!

Father God, Abba Father, I come to you today and I worship YOU, the best daddy a person could have.  Your advice is left for me in your Holy written Word. I feel you even in the midst of darkness. You never leave me, never. I can come to you and speak freely. You forgive and catch my  tears. You have a majestic home laid up for me, my inheritance is off the chain. You are my provider and healer. You are my comforter. You give me joy unspeakable that can not be matched by any earthly thing. I am in awe of you. I hunger to be more like you everday. Thank you for filling the void I feel. Thank you for giving me the ability to change my focus, to provide love for others who feel a void, and to trust again. I love you Jesus.  Amen.

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