This wasn’t MY plan…

I’m 34… I’m at the age when I start thinking I’m already 35 just because the new year has started when actually my birthday is still 9 months away.  I told someone just last week that I was 35 and one of my dear friends said “no you’re not”… this went back and forth for a while.  I actually argued with her and then counted the years.  Sad… I know!  Besides confusion of age, this year has also brought a lot of thought and remembrance.  I remember being a kid and wanting nothing more than to have a husband and children and was so afraid the rapture would take place before those things could ever come to pass.  I dreamed of being a famous Christian singer/songwriter doing laundry and living a normal life as much as I could while I was home and off the road from touring.  I had plans.  I had everything mapped out just perfectly and I just knew that God thought it was a great plan too.  After all, I thought up the plans and he made me and he wants to give me the desires of my heart and… and… and… I was talking myself into believing they were His plans.

I’m 34 now and while I understand that isn’t “old”, I also understand that it isn’t “young” either.  34 years have passed.  22 years of writing songs that very few people have heard have passed.  My voice isn’t as strong as it use to be.  I haven’t picked up my guitar in a couple of years.  I’m not even the worship leader at a church like I aspired to be if the famous thing didn’t work out.  I’ve never traveled outside the country for vacation purposes.  I’m in Direct sales again… something I swore I would never again do.  I thought I would have at least 3 children by now, but I only have 2.  I thought I would be at my former church until the day I died, but God moved us.  I thought I would never live in my home town as an adult but I do.  I planned to have written at least one book by now but I haven’t.  I thought I would never be the chunky mom in the back of the exercise class at the gym… but I am 😉  I never finished college and I have no regrets!

We worry way too much about other people’s opinions and we think way too much about “what we could have done”.  First of all, life isn’t over yet!  God’s not finished yet!  College hasn’t gone anywhere.  I still worship the Lord at church and home and in my car.  I have an amazing husband who loves the Lord and who’s faithful to me and Jesus.  I have two beautiful children that are smart and gorgeous/handsome.  I’m the local coordinator for the Nashville songwriters.  I’m a Director in my direct sales business.  My husband and I run the family business.  I go out of the country for mission trips.  I write a blog called “Wise Little Nuggets”.  I go inside the class at the gym instead of watching it through the glass now.  My life is good.  God did give me the core desires of my heart, he just gave them to me differently than I expected.

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Look around you.  What has the Lord blessed you with?  Are you in His will?  Look at the lives you touch everyday.  God is much more concerned about the love we show others and the lessons we learn and then teach our children than He is about the lessons we learn in college.  He is much more concerned about the mark we’re leaving on our families and friends on a daily basis than touring the world and leaving our mark from a stage for 2 hours.  He is much more concerned with how we pass this test called life than any test in school or at work.  While those other things are all important, the most important thing is our faithful walk with the Lord whatever and wherever that walk leads us.

What has God placed on your heart to do now or to do next?

Ephesians 4:12 (amp) His intention was the perfecting and the full equipping of the saints (His consecrated people), that they should do the work of ministering toward building up Christ’s body (the church)…

For some reason it seems we always look at the material or practical things in life when we make our plans.  We look at the job, the geography, the money, the curtains we need, the car we want, the ball game we deserve to go to because we work too hard, the dishes we have to clean, the diaper we have to change, the vacation we so badly need.  We feel like we’ll never get ahead, we’re always lacking something or someone and we always want more or at least something “better”.  Ephesians tells us that what He has called us to do, He will equip us to do.  He will give us all we need.

The lesson I have been teaching my children lately is this; “Just stop throwing a tantrum for just a moment and focus on what you do have rather than focussing on what you don’t have”.

We have to always have a plan B because we can’t always have our way.  So, I encourage you to keep an open heart and an open mind to allowing God to do His thing!

8 thoughts on “This wasn’t MY plan…

      1. I was reading in my local newspaper today and on the front page was about a mother who had three children and wanted a fourth but couldn’t seem to get pregnant. They tried and tried and was later diagnosed with PCOS. She found out 9 months ago (not even trying anymore to conceive) that they were expecting number 4. Her oldest is 14 and her youngest was 9. So never give up! They told her it was impossible. Thanks for following 🙂 I can’t wait to hear of a pregnancy announcement from you 😉

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      2. I’ve always said We’re going to end up being late life parents! Lol. We don’t feel complete… I know you know what I mean… We just know there is more to come. Thank you for the encouragement.

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